Let me set the picture, I’m sitting at a black jack table, playing $5 hands. Just enjoying the time I’m spending in Dublin. In most places in the U.S, I would not be allowed to gamble, so for me, this is a special treat.

Getting into the hand, I experienced this only about 40 minutes before writing this blog. I currently have $150 sitting in front of me, started with $125, so doing pretty well. I have been playing for over two hours and just sitting about even, waiting for a breakthrough. As I sit there, I all of sudden get this urge. I shove $120 of chips in the middle, I mean the guys next to me kept winning and they were playing $100 hands, so why couldn’t I? Then the cards were dealt. Everyone was silent. The first card was 8, followed by a 2. The dealer was showing a 5. This mean I had great odds of winning, but I thought bigger. I could double my bet and hope for a 7,8,9,10, or A and still have a strong hand. When doubling in black jack, you only receive one card. This would turn the hand into $240 hand. I’m freaking out inside, but I always play my hands the same way no matter how much money is on them. Something my dad taught me, so I could never mad at myself for my decisions. The dealer finally comes around to ask what I want to do. I tell the dealer “Double Down” and she puts the card face down to further excitement. The dealer begins to draw for herself. She pulls an ace, then a queen, leaving her at 16. The best number to see for any player. I just need a 6 or higher and I win. Then the card is drawn, it’s a 2. She has 18 and I still don’t know what I have. She goes to turn my card and its a 10! I have a 20 and just won the biggest bet of my life! I quickly grab my chips, leave a $5 tip, and leave the casino.

You might be thinking to yourself, what does this have to do with me not belonging? I have always loved gambling, but more importantly the stories. Every time I have ever been at a table, someone else has been granted those stories, but never me. The people at the table were playing $100 hands at a time and I was playing $5 for the most part. It really just didn’t feel right. I knew I was as good as any of them. It was just about pride when I placed that bet and wanting to belong at the table. I’m not a crazy gambler, but I was feeling the luck of the Irish and I found the gold at the end of the rainbow. God bless.